Nilofer Samina, Mysore, India. Retd professor of Urdu, Teresian College, affiliated to Mysore University. (elder daughter). <<-- Click to Read about Nilofer Samina
My mother, my teacher!
I was as much influenced by my mother as any other daughter of a good mother could be.!
As long as she was alive, she helped me to overcome all the problems, a girl or a woman has to face in life. After her death in 1986, the world was a new sphere of challenges which I faced one by one with a feeling that she is around me and guiding me. Now almost 25 years after her death, the feeling is the same and no day passes when I pray to God, while in stress, saying, "Oh God! why me? Ammi's child is so stressed? She would never get confused, or complain. She was so cool and calm always..always!"
Her life and character, has remained a great inspiration for so many of her students, family members, colleagues and other professors, that they say that they not only gained valuable knowledge, from her works but she was looked upon as an exemplary being always.
Though my mother Dr. Habeebunnisa Begum, was a working lady, she had been a good house wife, exemplary mother and grandmother, a good host to all relatives, friends, many eminent professors, etc. from all over India and abroad.
Prof Ather Javeed of Tirupathi University has written a long article about her explaining that Mysore city can never be the same cozy warm city, for Urdu writers and Professors, without her. His lengthy article was published in various magazines thrice. Every student doing his Ph.D in Urdu, from Mysore University about the writers of Old Mysore state, has to mention or quote from her works.
Some of the very eminent personalities who responded to her eager invitations and hospitality, were Professor Gian Chand jain and family, from Jammu ; Professor Ehteshaam Hussain, from Lucknow; Professor Nazeer Ahmed from Bombay, and Poet laureate Faiz Ahmed Faiz from Pakistan.
My mother was my teacher when I did my M.A. (Post graduation), in Mysore University. I was bit shy in the beginning but she was her usual motherly figure not only to me but to all the students around. This was a pleasant surprise to me. Not only then, or when she was the professor, or when she was the wife of a bold and honest M.P. , or when she was chairman of many a boards in Mysore University, even after her retirement, in old age and suffering due to leukemoid condition, at the end of her life, she was looked upon by people from all walks of life as a mentor and guide. And there she was as ever, for everyone to give sincere advice and bestow contagious smiles.
Dr. Nasreen Shahina, Algeria. (Younger Daughter)
If I have to describe our mother "Ammi" in the shortest manner, I would say that Ammi was embedded with the qualities of the most loving, caring and selfless mother blended with the gifts of being a best and truest friend, and an intellectual guide in all aspects of life, who not only brought us into this world but moulded all her children to become successful persons in life. To me the magic word "Ammi" is the most soothing remedy in all calamities , big or small, because Ammi has always stood by us & given us courage whenever we needed her , not only in the past but even now when she is fondly watching us from the Heavens.
Nusheen Hafeez, Canada (Grand Daughter) Daughter of Nilofer Samina
The very word “Ammi” strikes a musical note in my heart. You were holding my hand just the other day but when I woke up you weren’t there. It’s been 24 years now that you have gone from this world, but your love is still brimming in my heart. Your touch, your smile & your philosophies are the guiding lights of my life.
I miss you Ammi. I haven’t had a friend like you since you’ve gone. You were my grandmother but you were my best friend. We played, we laughed, we shared stories of our lives, we made traditional sweets, tried new recipes, embroidered, painted, knitted, weaved baskets; and we also went to movies, shopping and traveling together. One day you started to talk all good about joint families later I realized you was preparing me for marriage. I went very far away from you after I got married. You were so happy and supportive when I came back to India for the birth of my daughter. When I went back, I rarely wrote to you, but you never complained, instead always wrote loving letters and news about things we’d do together when I returned.When I look back, I was very young when we’d speak about the spirituality in Islam, read on the changing status of women around the world, and discuss the “Life after Death” series in Illustrated Weekly magazine. What an ardent lover of beauty you were! You saw beauty in everything. You made me realize the perfections of nature and the delicate nuances of feelings and emotions that only human beings are blessed with. Be it sorrow or joy, hate or love, instead of dwelling in it, I need to praise Allah for making me feel these strong abstract feelings created especially for me. I remember you had also said that gratitude and regret are glimpses of heaven and hell on earth. You never made me feel that I was too young to understand your thoughts. I used to love it when you’d wait for me to come from school to tell me something new and exciting every day.
One evening after I came back from school you had said – “Oun ke aane se aa jaati hei mooh pe raunakh, who samjhte hei ki bimaar ka haal achha hei”; later Mummy told me that you had fever that morning. Never had I seen you dull nor depressed, never did I feel the 50 years of age difference between us. Never did I think that one day you’d be no more even though you tried to prepare me for it.At the break of dawn, you’d be in the garden picking up dead leaves and talking and humming to your collections of colourful plants and roses. It was a cold morning that day when I saw you bending down to fix the roots of an expensive plant with huge purple flowers. You had loving brought it all the way from the botanical gardens in Ooty. I may have been 7 years old then. I went and sat beside you. I still remember the fragrance of your garden and the dew on the leaves as I clung on to you. While you were digging the earth, you showed me how the main root of the plant had grown around a big stone. “If we work around our hurdles we will also grow and bloom like this plant” you had said.
There were many more incidents with you that taught me “Not to stand out, but be outstanding"; "Only I am responsible for what I am"; "It’s worth to go miles to give a smile"; “To scare problems away with solutions”, “The strongest person is the one who can control anger”….. Did I understand all that at that tender age? Yes I did because you made it so simple for me and I try to follow it even to this day.
You’d once said that when I was a new-born, I looked into your eyes and smiled and it reminded you of my late grandfather, now everytime my grandson looks into my eyes and smiles, he reminds me of you.
Ammi, I can’t love you enough for not underestimating my understanding when I was small. I cannot thank you enough for being my Friend Philosopher and Guide.
Yours Lovingly,
Nusheen (Nusha as you called me).
From Shehla Syed, Chicago (Grand Daughter) Daughter of Nilofer Samina
My Grandmother
I am one of her younger grand children. I knew her in her latter part of life. What I learned from her is more from her actions as she battled a terminal illness than from any philosophical conversations. I was not around when she was in her prime. In fact for the longest of time I did not even know she was a professor. There is story behind how I found that out, but it is too long to narrate here. In my early childhood she was just my grandmother who loved me very much. I remember how I would run into her lap and she would hold me tight as I chewed on the gold chain around her neck. That for me was the safest place to be whenever my mother was not around. As I grew I noticed that she was an extremely interesting person with many different hobbies. I enjoyed every new thing she introduced to me and other little girls of the neighborhood who had suddenly taken an interest just like me in her hobbies. I remember the numerous warm summer afternoons we spent in her house knitting, embroidering and crocheting. I didn't mind sharing my grandmother with so many girls my own age as I knew intuitively that I was more special to her than everyone else. Maybe it was the loving glance that she threw towards me occasionally. I spend many hours with her alone too as I helped her in the garden.
We would sometimes chat happily and other times just work silently. But I found comfort just being close to her. As an adult I still find comfort in gardening and I always remember her when my hands are covered with dirt. By now I knew she had cancer. I had been terrified when I had overheard my parents, aunts and uncles discuss her health and treatment options with her. Even as a child I had wondered at her courage in facing her illness so calmly. For many years after I would peep through the window as she napped in the afternoons just to make sure she was still breathing.The first time she helped me with schoolwork was for a Science test. I surprised myself and my teacher with a 100%. My grandmother was ecstatic.
She was so proud of me that day that I decided to do well in school from that day on and I never looked back. She started taking a special interest in my education. We had found another topic of conversation. I would look forward to sharing my small achievements in school with her. She drilled the value of scholarship in me. But she also drilled the importance of humility in success. As I grew bigger and stronger, my grandmother grew weaker and sicker. Although her body was failing, her mind was still sharp. She amazed me with her patience and courage. She was bedridden for a month one time and our whole family worried and prayed for her recovery. All of a sudden she was better one day. I came home from school and she was sitting up! She slowly recovered for a few days and I was excited. My grandmother asked me to take her for a walk. I held her hand and we walked around the house. We chatted like we used to before, it was such a treat! I will never forget that day.
Slowly, her health deteriorated again. I felt helpless as did everyone else. She still enjoyed my company although she was not strong enough to say it. I spent many hours by her bedside sitting quietly reading or doing my homework. She would reach for my hand and hold it for a bit. I was there a few minutes before she passed away. I was sent away from the room for being too young to witness her passing. I was twelve. I was so sad that I could not even cry for a whole day. I barely spoke to anyone. It has been 24 years since but they seem like a drop in the ocean of 12 years of memories that I have of my grandmother.
Aslam Parviz, New York (Grand Son) Son of Nilofer Samina
My recollection of my grand mother Bade Ammi is that of a very caring mother figure, in her presence we felt safe, comfortable and very loved. During my teenage I also realised how intellectually honest she was, looking into more research and changing a long held opinion. (this was when she spoke about the period right after our Prohet's death). Unfortunatley I cannot remember the details but I remember to this day that it is ok to look at things differently if facts present themselves to prove my current point of view wrong. (Anjummu)
Rasheed Ali, Mysore (Son in Law)
Ammi was an embodiment of love, & charishma. She was a mother to me, at the age of 25 I experienced the other side of Mamtha which I had missed. I wonder how one can be so perfect in all aspects, She had the highest qualifications of two MA s and a Ph.D, occupied the highest seat of learning and teaching. A professor at Post Graduate and research Department, yet she was so simple. Any one could approach her for guidance. Not only in academic fields in all other aspects of life she was perfect. Be it be cooking, embroidery, knitting or painting, she was interested and created interest in others. She was a perfect mother, teacher and human being. Also God fearing . I am sure that God will bestow, HIS choicest blessings on her.
My mother, my teacher!
I was as much influenced by my mother as any other daughter of a good mother could be.!
As long as she was alive, she helped me to overcome all the problems, a girl or a woman has to face in life. After her death in 1986, the world was a new sphere of challenges which I faced one by one with a feeling that she is around me and guiding me. Now almost 25 years after her death, the feeling is the same and no day passes when I pray to God, while in stress, saying, "Oh God! why me? Ammi's child is so stressed? She would never get confused, or complain. She was so cool and calm always..always!"
Her life and character, has remained a great inspiration for so many of her students, family members, colleagues and other professors, that they say that they not only gained valuable knowledge, from her works but she was looked upon as an exemplary being always.
Though my mother Dr. Habeebunnisa Begum, was a working lady, she had been a good house wife, exemplary mother and grandmother, a good host to all relatives, friends, many eminent professors, etc. from all over India and abroad.
Prof Ather Javeed of Tirupathi University has written a long article about her explaining that Mysore city can never be the same cozy warm city, for Urdu writers and Professors, without her. His lengthy article was published in various magazines thrice. Every student doing his Ph.D in Urdu, from Mysore University about the writers of Old Mysore state, has to mention or quote from her works.
Some of the very eminent personalities who responded to her eager invitations and hospitality, were Professor Gian Chand jain and family, from Jammu ; Professor Ehteshaam Hussain, from Lucknow; Professor Nazeer Ahmed from Bombay, and Poet laureate Faiz Ahmed Faiz from Pakistan.
My mother was my teacher when I did my M.A. (Post graduation), in Mysore University. I was bit shy in the beginning but she was her usual motherly figure not only to me but to all the students around. This was a pleasant surprise to me. Not only then, or when she was the professor, or when she was the wife of a bold and honest M.P. , or when she was chairman of many a boards in Mysore University, even after her retirement, in old age and suffering due to leukemoid condition, at the end of her life, she was looked upon by people from all walks of life as a mentor and guide. And there she was as ever, for everyone to give sincere advice and bestow contagious smiles.
Dr. Nasreen Shahina, Algeria. (Younger Daughter)
If I have to describe our mother "Ammi" in the shortest manner, I would say that Ammi was embedded with the qualities of the most loving, caring and selfless mother blended with the gifts of being a best and truest friend, and an intellectual guide in all aspects of life, who not only brought us into this world but moulded all her children to become successful persons in life. To me the magic word "Ammi" is the most soothing remedy in all calamities , big or small, because Ammi has always stood by us & given us courage whenever we needed her , not only in the past but even now when she is fondly watching us from the Heavens.
Nusheen Hafeez, Canada (Grand Daughter) Daughter of Nilofer Samina
The very word “Ammi” strikes a musical note in my heart. You were holding my hand just the other day but when I woke up you weren’t there. It’s been 24 years now that you have gone from this world, but your love is still brimming in my heart. Your touch, your smile & your philosophies are the guiding lights of my life.
I miss you Ammi. I haven’t had a friend like you since you’ve gone. You were my grandmother but you were my best friend. We played, we laughed, we shared stories of our lives, we made traditional sweets, tried new recipes, embroidered, painted, knitted, weaved baskets; and we also went to movies, shopping and traveling together. One day you started to talk all good about joint families later I realized you was preparing me for marriage. I went very far away from you after I got married. You were so happy and supportive when I came back to India for the birth of my daughter. When I went back, I rarely wrote to you, but you never complained, instead always wrote loving letters and news about things we’d do together when I returned.When I look back, I was very young when we’d speak about the spirituality in Islam, read on the changing status of women around the world, and discuss the “Life after Death” series in Illustrated Weekly magazine. What an ardent lover of beauty you were! You saw beauty in everything. You made me realize the perfections of nature and the delicate nuances of feelings and emotions that only human beings are blessed with. Be it sorrow or joy, hate or love, instead of dwelling in it, I need to praise Allah for making me feel these strong abstract feelings created especially for me. I remember you had also said that gratitude and regret are glimpses of heaven and hell on earth. You never made me feel that I was too young to understand your thoughts. I used to love it when you’d wait for me to come from school to tell me something new and exciting every day.
One evening after I came back from school you had said – “Oun ke aane se aa jaati hei mooh pe raunakh, who samjhte hei ki bimaar ka haal achha hei”; later Mummy told me that you had fever that morning. Never had I seen you dull nor depressed, never did I feel the 50 years of age difference between us. Never did I think that one day you’d be no more even though you tried to prepare me for it.At the break of dawn, you’d be in the garden picking up dead leaves and talking and humming to your collections of colourful plants and roses. It was a cold morning that day when I saw you bending down to fix the roots of an expensive plant with huge purple flowers. You had loving brought it all the way from the botanical gardens in Ooty. I may have been 7 years old then. I went and sat beside you. I still remember the fragrance of your garden and the dew on the leaves as I clung on to you. While you were digging the earth, you showed me how the main root of the plant had grown around a big stone. “If we work around our hurdles we will also grow and bloom like this plant” you had said.
There were many more incidents with you that taught me “Not to stand out, but be outstanding"; "Only I am responsible for what I am"; "It’s worth to go miles to give a smile"; “To scare problems away with solutions”, “The strongest person is the one who can control anger”….. Did I understand all that at that tender age? Yes I did because you made it so simple for me and I try to follow it even to this day.
You’d once said that when I was a new-born, I looked into your eyes and smiled and it reminded you of my late grandfather, now everytime my grandson looks into my eyes and smiles, he reminds me of you.
Ammi, I can’t love you enough for not underestimating my understanding when I was small. I cannot thank you enough for being my Friend Philosopher and Guide.
Yours Lovingly,
Nusheen (Nusha as you called me).
From Shehla Syed, Chicago (Grand Daughter) Daughter of Nilofer Samina
My Grandmother
I am one of her younger grand children. I knew her in her latter part of life. What I learned from her is more from her actions as she battled a terminal illness than from any philosophical conversations. I was not around when she was in her prime. In fact for the longest of time I did not even know she was a professor. There is story behind how I found that out, but it is too long to narrate here. In my early childhood she was just my grandmother who loved me very much. I remember how I would run into her lap and she would hold me tight as I chewed on the gold chain around her neck. That for me was the safest place to be whenever my mother was not around. As I grew I noticed that she was an extremely interesting person with many different hobbies. I enjoyed every new thing she introduced to me and other little girls of the neighborhood who had suddenly taken an interest just like me in her hobbies. I remember the numerous warm summer afternoons we spent in her house knitting, embroidering and crocheting. I didn't mind sharing my grandmother with so many girls my own age as I knew intuitively that I was more special to her than everyone else. Maybe it was the loving glance that she threw towards me occasionally. I spend many hours with her alone too as I helped her in the garden.
We would sometimes chat happily and other times just work silently. But I found comfort just being close to her. As an adult I still find comfort in gardening and I always remember her when my hands are covered with dirt. By now I knew she had cancer. I had been terrified when I had overheard my parents, aunts and uncles discuss her health and treatment options with her. Even as a child I had wondered at her courage in facing her illness so calmly. For many years after I would peep through the window as she napped in the afternoons just to make sure she was still breathing.The first time she helped me with schoolwork was for a Science test. I surprised myself and my teacher with a 100%. My grandmother was ecstatic.
She was so proud of me that day that I decided to do well in school from that day on and I never looked back. She started taking a special interest in my education. We had found another topic of conversation. I would look forward to sharing my small achievements in school with her. She drilled the value of scholarship in me. But she also drilled the importance of humility in success. As I grew bigger and stronger, my grandmother grew weaker and sicker. Although her body was failing, her mind was still sharp. She amazed me with her patience and courage. She was bedridden for a month one time and our whole family worried and prayed for her recovery. All of a sudden she was better one day. I came home from school and she was sitting up! She slowly recovered for a few days and I was excited. My grandmother asked me to take her for a walk. I held her hand and we walked around the house. We chatted like we used to before, it was such a treat! I will never forget that day.
Slowly, her health deteriorated again. I felt helpless as did everyone else. She still enjoyed my company although she was not strong enough to say it. I spent many hours by her bedside sitting quietly reading or doing my homework. She would reach for my hand and hold it for a bit. I was there a few minutes before she passed away. I was sent away from the room for being too young to witness her passing. I was twelve. I was so sad that I could not even cry for a whole day. I barely spoke to anyone. It has been 24 years since but they seem like a drop in the ocean of 12 years of memories that I have of my grandmother.
Aslam Parviz, New York (Grand Son) Son of Nilofer Samina
My recollection of my grand mother Bade Ammi is that of a very caring mother figure, in her presence we felt safe, comfortable and very loved. During my teenage I also realised how intellectually honest she was, looking into more research and changing a long held opinion. (this was when she spoke about the period right after our Prohet's death). Unfortunatley I cannot remember the details but I remember to this day that it is ok to look at things differently if facts present themselves to prove my current point of view wrong. (Anjummu)
Rasheed Ali, Mysore (Son in Law)
Ammi was an embodiment of love, & charishma. She was a mother to me, at the age of 25 I experienced the other side of Mamtha which I had missed. I wonder how one can be so perfect in all aspects, She had the highest qualifications of two MA s and a Ph.D, occupied the highest seat of learning and teaching. A professor at Post Graduate and research Department, yet she was so simple. Any one could approach her for guidance. Not only in academic fields in all other aspects of life she was perfect. Be it be cooking, embroidery, knitting or painting, she was interested and created interest in others. She was a perfect mother, teacher and human being. Also God fearing . I am sure that God will bestow, HIS choicest blessings on her.
In 1920 & 1930s When Dr Habeebunnisa and her elder sister (late) Mrs Rahmathunnisa (Retired DDPI OF SCHOOLS).were challenged by old women around to cook or show their embroidery or other handi crafts that women sitting at home did, they had to excel in every art to prove that the girls getting educated van be the best too. Once as tenagers they cooked something that was very tasty but its consistensy was not good enough. When a granny asked them what this new sweet was, they said it is " Vascodegama". The lady forgot the name as they wished but always praised the desert she had had.
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